Angel In Disguise
When we met, I was a soul lost and incomplete. Every morning I would awake with a smile on my face, but in my heart there was nothing but heartache and pain. It seemed as if the trials and tribulations of life had taken its toll on my heart, soul, and mind. I tried to live each day to the fullest, with no regard for tomorrow. However, the fear of going through life alone caused me to build a wall around my heart - refusing to let anyone in.
Angel came at the most pivotal moment in my life. I was in danger of hitting rock bottom when she looked into my eyes and saw the depths of my soul. She took my hand and asked me to trust in her, as she led me on a journey of blissful ecstasies. She broke down all of my defenses and opened my heart to love again. I trusted and believed in her, because I knew with her my heart was in good hands. Angel demands the friendship, love, and trust a healthy relationship commands. She became the reason for the smile on my face, the chill down my spine, and the pep in my step. Most importantly, the warmth and comfort of her helps me to realize that I never knew love until she came into my life.
Tonight is the saddest night we’re going through, because the thought of leaving her has crossed my mind. Lately things have not been easy for us, because she has revealed the truth of her promiscuous past. The news does not change the love we share, but it does challenge the significance of our relationship. The challenge of sorting through all of these emotions, to think logically, presents a difficult task for me. However, the time has come for me to realize, just how much she means to me?
It is not her I have a hard time accepting - it is the act of spreading herself thin that troubles me most. The woman, I love and hope to share my life with, has given her body and soul to many others in the name of fun. Consequently, these acts of indecency have tainted the perception I have of her. I am aware these acts occurred in her past, but the reality of her actions will live long in my heart and mind. The woman I call friend, lover, mother, and wife must exhibit an understanding of self-worth, because the strength of a woman is essential to the foundation and stability of a family. In the womb of a woman is where life originates, so it is important that she treasures the gift.
It’s morning, and I need to take time to think things over. Reluctantly, I try to find the “good” in having to say goodbye, but to no avail. As my day grows older, my life begins to grow colder; I am reminded it is her love that keeps me warm. She and her love are the best things that happened to me. The way her love has lasted, it's constant power and endurance, makes it easy for me to want “together forever” (our first endeavor). All of the love and sacrifices she has made for me cannot be forgotten, nor can they be replaced. With every breath I breathe, it reminds my heart of her, and I am able to recall getting on my knees, staring into the heavens above and asking the Lord, in silent prayer, “Please send me a love that will captivate my mind, body, and soul.” Then she came, like morning dew to the ground - Angel came.
It has taken watching her walk out the door for my heart to open and realize I have nothing to lose by giving my all to her. I feared loving her could be in vain, but I cannot think of any one more deserving of my love than Angel. Angel makes me feel a passion for life that I never dreamed possible. She has helped me to find beauty in life, with all of its joys and pains, as well as, help me to discover the uncharted realms of my love. It is because of her I am a better man.
The joys and pains of loving have provided me with the strength to continue my quest to become one with God. It is through Him I am able to make a commitment of unconditional love; thus realizing the true secret to my happiness is her presence in my life. Every moment shared with her is paradise.