Q.

When I was 13, I fell desperately in love with a man. I am now 21 years old and have recently left and moved to Texas to marry someone else. However, I could not go through with it. When I came back home, I sought out my original childhood love, but discovered he is now with someone else. To win him over, I poured my heart out and expressed I want to marry him. His response was that he is not ready to get married.

I feel that he simply does not want to get hurt. I need advice now.

A.

You seem a bit confused as to exactly what you want in life and in a man. If you loved this man since 13, then you would not ponder marrying someone else, unless he has told you already he is not interest. Therefore, why would things change now that you return home after jilting another man? That is not the character of someone desiring a stable relationship.

If a person tells you the reason why they do not want to be with you, the substance of the reason is irrelevant, the bottom line is that they are not interested in you the same way you are interested in them, and therefore you should respect their decision. Concocting your own definitions will only lead you to greater heartbreak when reality settles in.